Vibrators are having a major moment, but it can be tricky for beginners to figure out how and where to use them. Whether you’re solo or partnered, these sex toys are extremely versatile and can stimulate an entire range of erogenous zones.
If you’re unsure where to start, consider titillating and teasing the area around your vulva first. This will help you feel more confident and comfortable with stroking, teasing and stimulating your clitoris later on.
Start Slowly
When first using a vibrator, it’s important to start slow. This not only helps you gauge your own pleasure, but it also lets your partner know how much pressure feels good for them.
Most men begin by pressing the toy on their penis, as it’s a common erogenous zone for male masturbation. While this is a great place to start, it’s also a good idea to experiment with other areas of the body too. Massaging the nipples, neck, inner thighs and even around the testicles can create an intense sensation.
Billy Beyer, founder of luxury toy brand Lickerish Love, tells POPSUGAR that many people don’t realize that the frenulum—a small ridge of tissue connecting the foreskin to the penis shaft—is extremely sensitive. By pressing the toy on this area, men can experience a rush of pleasure, similar to orgasm.
For a little extra thrill, try stroking the anus with a vibrator—it’s another erogenous spot that can feel amazing with the right touch. It may be uncomfortable at first, but it will get more pleasurable as you use it and increase the pressure.
Press It Against Your Skin
In many ways, vibrators are like a sex toy for the body: they can be used in different places to give you or your partner new pleasures. While most men use a vibrator on the clitus or anal area, there are plenty of other ways to have fun with one.
While some women do enjoy having men press a vibe into their clitoris, vulva, or anus, this can be uncomfortable or even painful for some. It’s best to let your partner show you how they want the device pressed, and to make sure they’re comfortable with the sensations.
You can also try teasing the skin with a vibe by lightly touching it against your neck, your nipples, or other sweet spots that send an erotic shiver down your spine. Just be sure the toy you choose is made from body-safe materials and that it’s safe for that specific area. For instance, anal penetration requires a toy that’s specifically designed for that area, often with a flanged base to prevent it from going all the way inside.
Stroke The Nipples
Although women are often the ones who press vibrators into their clitoris, vaginal lips, and anuses, men can also use them in this area. However, it’s a good idea to talk to your partner about it first to make sure they’re comfortable with you holding one near their genitals. Ask them what they like and don’t like about it, which can help you know how hard or soft to go.
Nipple play can be a huge part of foreplay, sex, and solo fun, no matter what gender you’re with. If your partner is nipple play-friendly, try lightly brushing their nipples with the vibe to stimulate their skin and increase sensitivity. Then, if they’re okay with it, slowly increase the pressure as you tease them and move it around their areolas.
The head of the penis can also be a hot spot, Schreck says. It’s a simple, beginner-friendly move that can be used with different settings and speeds to create mind-blowing sensations. You can even add lubricant to up the intensity. Just be careful not to push it too far down to the testicles or perineum, which can cause pain and discomfort.
Tease The Penis
Many people think that vibrators are only meant to stimulate the genitals but, in reality, there are lots of other erogenous zones on the body that can feel great when touched with a vibrator. For example, a man’s thighs, neck and inner wrists are all areas that can give men intense pleasure.
Using the length of the vibrator to tease the head and shaft of the penis can be really fun for some men. If you want to be more direct, press the end of the vibrator against the clitoral hood and move it back and forth or in circular motions.
Some men find it pleasurable to massage the anal area with a vibrator but be careful not to go too deep because you could risk irritating the prostate. If you want to try this, start on the lowest setting and gradually increase the pressure until you reach your desired sensation. Lastly, use lube to make things more enjoyable. This helps avoid overstimulation and keeps the anal slick, making it easier for the toy to enter your anus.
Move It Around
If you’re using a vibrator with a partner, you can move it around your body to give each other pleasure. The nipples, inner thighs, back of the neck, testicles, shaft and perineum are all areas where you can apply vibration for orgasm. It’s important to remember that STIs can be transmitted by sharing vibrators, so it’s a good idea to use condoms or another barrier method when you share one.
A vibrator can also be used for intimate massage. “If you place it lightly on the small of the back, it can activate desire,” says Billy Beyer, founder of luxury toy brand Lickerish Love. Then move it down the groin and thigh to tease the clitoris and up the pressure.
Vibrators can also help reduce sex pain. Stress causes the body to release a hormone called cortisol, which can constrict the arteries that carry blood into the penis. Having a vibrator in bed can reduce this effect by giving the penis a little extra stimulation. This can be especially helpful for men who suffer from erection issues due to a medical condition like fibromyalgia or diabetes.
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